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But despite the publicist's initial perseverance, no confirmation email with details of venue was ever returned to me. It wasn't that I allowed my colleague to cow me. I never got to see the advance screening of Jeune & Jolie. Just make sure no one thinks you're trying the popcorn trick. People will soon get the message that you're only there for the intense drama. Take a leaf out of their book by rustling snacks, checking your phone or snoring whenever there's nudity on show. They may have the perfect excuse to see the film in the first place, but when it comes to actually writing about it, the fear that they'll be accused of inappropriately appreciating sexually explicit scenes often leads them to dismissing them instead as boring. Pretend it's boringĪ male film critic trick. If there's any chance she might take a graphic depiction of cunnilingus as a weird message that you'd like to move out of the friend zone, this could go very wrong. Inform her of the content of the film beforehand, and ensure that you're both comfortable with the platonic status of your relationship.
BLUE IS THE WARMEST COLOUR TRAILER MOVIE
If you find yourself reassuring her with a line like "This is a movie that a lot of couples go to … all kinds of couples", you've misjudged the mood. On a first date, Blue Is the Warmest Colour might be a step into Travis Bickle territory. You'll arouse little suspicion from cinema employees and fellow audience members, but your companion could be less impressed. Yes, just the one ticket, thanks." Go with a date Since the advent of internet porn they're all at home sitting in dirty dressing gowns instead. In fact, I think the dirty raincoat brigade has been disbanded. Don't worry – I'm not part of the dirty raincoat brigade. Make a joke about it when you buy the ticket "Blue Is the Warmest Colour, please. You are clearly a valued member of the local intelligentsia – can I interest you in some carrot cake? Why, only last week you were in watching a documentary about the massacres in Indonesia, sir. Visit the cinema regularly and the box office staff at least won't think anything of it when you turn up for a film that happens to have strong sexual content.
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So if you're determined to see Blue Is the Warmest Colour, Jeune & Jolie or whatever tender tale of sexual awakening next plays at your local arthouse cinema, you might want to consider these strategies to avoid blushing when you arrive and ending up buying a ticket for whatever's playing on the other screen instead. Certainly a minefield for a single heterosexual man. "But Ozon's In the House was one of my favourite films last year," I appealed. Could I do so for the first time, to see a film that happens to be about a teenage girl's sexual experimentation? I consulted a female colleague.
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I'd never said yes to any of these advance screenings this publicist had offered before. On the other, Jeune & Jolie is another film featuring a young actress in the nip, a fact not shied away from in the publicity materials. On the one hand, I'm a fan of Ozon's mysterious, unsettling dramas. When I received an invitation to an advance screening of François Ozon's latest, Jeune & Jolie, I was torn.
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BLUE IS THE WARMEST COLOUR TRAILER CODE
So we seem to be back to the era of the "arty European film" being code for "a bit mucky". In an era of $200bn movies about robots hitting each other, a flash of Megan Fox in a bikini is more likely to test-screen well than Kim Basinger and Mickey Rourke pouring the contents of the fridge over each other's bodies, which is just as well, as they're both about 60 now and probably not up for doing that kind of thing any more. But Hollywood, no stranger to the concept of selling, is in retreat from the full-on sex scene. There's a widespread perception that sex sells, in cinema, as elsewhere. People could get the wrong idea when I arrive at the box office. It's a lesbian coming-of-age drama that features an explicit seven-minute sex scene between its two young female leads. Why would I not see Blue Is The Warmest Colour? And it's playing at the cinema that lies three minutes' walk from my flat. A friend of mine was so affected by its naturalistic power that he found himself waking up the next day and wondering if Adèle, the film's chief protagonist, was doing OK. Peter Bradshaw's given it a glowing review.